I Hope There's Chocolate in Hell
by Elsyra
Summary: Just after his death, Mello must complete a test that will determine whether he goes to Heaven or Hell... and whether or not he sees Matt ever again. Rated K  for mild swearing. Slash. MattxMello!


This fic is for Lady Lilac, written as a request. It's one of my favourite slash pairings ever! Freshly edited as of today. Please R&R and enjoy!

~Elsie

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><p>Mello is waiting an agonizingly long time for his judgment. <em>Can't they just send me to Hell already? I've committed way too many sins–I wonder how bad they consider kidnapping an accessory to murder here… I'm definitely damned. This waiting is starting to piss me off!<em> But they just won't tell him. The blonde looks down at his hands absentmindedly and a thought pops into his head that makes him blanch.

_What if there's no chocolate in Hell__‽_

A boy with red hair and bright eyes is sitting in another waiting room next door and they let him see Mello unless he completes his test. It looks like there aren't even any windows, so Mello can't mouth what he needs to say to Mail. He wants to confess how sorry he is and that he didn't mean for the man to die. Little does Mello know, Mail has been watching over him ever in death.

Mail watched as his friend reacted to the death his TV and felt like he was losing his mind. Mail watched him take his last breath, clouded in smoke, and cried silent tears. _But at least now he's somewhat near. _The redhead laughs, an underlying bitterness to his usual joking attitude, because he could sense that Mello was craving his chocolate.

_It's been _how_ many years and it's still the damn chocolate over me!_

After an indefinite amount of time, a door in Mello's room opens. His destination smells good. He steps inside the next room gratefully, because whether or not its walls will swallow him whole or not, he can't stand the stagnant air anymore. An audible gasp fills the air as the blond looks around.

The space seems never-ending and there, reaching up to his shoulders in height, lays the largest bar of chocolate that Mello has ever seen in his entire life – well, afterlife, that is. His eyes skim the wrapper, a dark pink for raspberry flavoring. Mello prefers plain chocolate, but who is he to complain if this is his heavenly reward? He doesn't know where to start. But before he can dive into the sweet, silky, creamy goodness that is his favourite treat, the pink ribbon tied around the chocolate bar unravels into a heap at his feet.

Mello is salivating with desire for the chocolate, fingers reaching out to touch it. Yet, a small part of his mind tells him to be wary and examine the ribbon. He notices the golden writing on the fibers, spelling out a small poem. _This must be some sort of test, _Mello tells himself silently, lifting the inscription closer to his eyes.

_Chose me and I shall make you the king_

_You've always strived to be_

_The number one who won't come undone_

_Or be called second best_

_Take three bites; this is your night_

_You shall get what you deserve_

A small face framed by white hair flashes in Mello's mind, taunting him mercilessly without even parting its lips to say a word. Mello grits his teeth and tears away part of the wrapper, then takes the biggest bite of gooey chocolate he could fit in his mouth. _Hell, does this taste good! _It melts in his mouth and savors every sweet second as he ravages the chocolate.

What Mello can't see is the horrified expression on Mail's face as a window to his friend's holding chamber appears. The redhead knows Mello is failing his test, but no matter how hard he bangs on the glass or how piercing his scream is, he won't be heard. An angel stands next to Mail and asks him to stop screaming, since it does neither of them any good.

"Why can't I help him? He doesn't know; he's never done this before!"

Pensive eyes stare back at Mail to examine his aura. _Neither had you, but you passed_, she says softly. _This is not the kind of test one can practice for, silly Mail. You are intelligent enough to know that already. So why do you seem so lost?_

"What if he doesn't make it here‽ Will I still be able to talk to him before…?"

His guardian angel, Yvonne, shakes her head sorrowfully, golden-brown curls swaying against her back. _Down there, all your sources of joy are taken away, so I do not think they would allow you to—_

"Are you saying that—_I _am Mihael's source of joy?" Mail's emerald eyes grow wide as he looked at his mentor.

_One of them, s_he murmurs, nodding. _He does love you, doesn't he?_

Mail finds he can't answer that question. Instead, he asks, "is being in love with him a sin here?"

_I think you'll find that God is more forgiving than human kind gives him credit for, what with all the suffering people must endure on earth._

"If he goes to Hell… can I choose to go with him?"

Yvonne's face is shocked and she stares at her charge. _You—would give this up to be damned with him? _She shakes her head in incredulous wonder.

"I would," Mail says softly, concentrating on Mello, who has just taken his second bite of the raspberry chocolate. "He would need a friend down there. Being damned wouldn't be nearly as horrible if I could be with him." The redhead's gaze wanders to the bottom of Mello's chocolate bar, where something red that looks suspiciously like blood pools around the blonde's feet.

"STOP, MIHAEL!" Mail screeches, pounding on wall-thick glass to no avail. "IT'S A TRICK!" His voice starts to crack and becomes softer. "Please—don't…" He sees Mello pause and pick up the ribbon at the same time as he tries to wipe his face. _Did he hear me…?_

Mello rereads the poem and closes his eyes in thought. He remembers feeling second-best to Near for as long as he could remember, wanting to be at least equal. Both of L's successors had qualities that made them gifted and unique. What good would trying to beat Near do him now when he was dead? Here, in his afterlife, the intelligent, apathetic card house addict could no longer out do him. He no longer needed to compete, not when he might have a chance to see Matt and apologize for his untimely death.

Backing away from the chocolate, the blond sees a red liquid he hadn't noticed oozing out of the sweet. It withdraws from his feet and flows back into containment. Mello reaches to shield his eyes when there is a flash of light and yet another chocolate bar, noticeably smaller this time but still abnormally large. Its red wrapper claims it is peppermint and the ribbon tied around it unravels at Mello's feet. He reads the next poem warily.

_Chose me and I shall let you take back sins_

_You've bitterly strived to erase_

_The endless weight, at your heart and soul it ate,_

_Will be no more_

_Take two bites; this is your night_

_You shall get what you deserve_

Mello sighs and remembers seeing his best friend's death on a television screen, feeling an indescribable sorrow he prays never to relive. He thinks of Matt's bright eyes and how painful it is to know they were dull and lifeless. _If I take it all back, he will never have to suffer that way again… _Slowly this time, Mello parts his lips and takes a bite of the too-sweet chocolate.

Mail watches in agony, glancing at Yvonne now and then for support, as Mello continues to fail. The blood-like substance is trickling over the chocoholic's skin again, yet he doesn't notice. Screaming won't work, and Mail starts to break down, falling to the ground against the window. Even the angel's soothing whispers cannot calm him as Mello lifts his lips to the sweet for a second time. "Please don't do it," Mail whispers, "please don't leave, Mihael!"

As if he can hear Mail, Mello stops once more. He wonders what Matt and Near would say if he were solving a puzzle like this during life. _Eating a piece of chocolate can't take back what I have done… If I ever see him again, I can beg for his forgiveness._

Something in the back of Mello's mind tells him to hold out his hands. The peppermint bar has vanishes and in the blonde's hands is a tiny chocolate, wrapped in a large green ribbon. _As green as _his _eyes…_

_Chose me and you shall go on_

_Though simple it may be_

_You'll face whatever lies ahead with courage_

_Whether it be good or filled with dread_

_Take one bite for the night_

_That one is what you keep in the morning_

Taking in the scent, Mello can tell it is plain milk chocolate – his favourite. He sees only Matt – no, _Mail's _face – as he puts the chocolate in his mouth and bites it, wishing he had the chance to say goodbye before he is permanently damned.

Mail can hardly breathe.

_Welcome, _a soft voice says in her new charge's ear. An angel with dark hair and bright eyes takes his arm and covers his eyes with her other hand.

Yvonne laughs as her own ward glares, jealous that the brunette is touching _his_ Mihael. _You should see you face! My, my, possessive today, aren't we?_

The window in front of Mail and Yvonne quickly formed a door, out of which Mello's guardian angel led him. Mello gasped at the feeling of clouds on his now-bare feet, the feeling of a clean, silken robe on his skin instead of his bloody clothes.

_You will go by your true name, here where there are no secrets, young one._

Blue eyes opened wide to gaze at his best friend, who looked just as shocked as he feels. Mail is the first to recover, scrambling to gather Mihael in an embrace. Mihael kisses Mail's face, ecstatic enough to cry, and nuzzles his head against the redhead's neck.

"You scared me… I thought you wouldn't make it here, but even if you didn't, I would've gone with you."

"I'm still trying to figure out whether or not this is a very good dream."

"I think that might just be what Heaven is – a dream."

"Even if it is, I think it's perfect." Mihael lifts Mail's chin and smiles. "And you know what else, Mail?"

"What?"

"I don't even care if there's no chocolate in Heaven."

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><p>To Lady Lilac: I hope you enjoyed it!<p>

Too fluffy? Well written? Please let me know what you think!


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